Become Friends With Your Inner Critic

Your inner critic is one of the meanest voices you will ever come across. It is constantly in your face, telling you all the things you are doing wrong. It snaps at you regularly and continuously tells you how worthless you are.

But this voice was placed there by none other than yourself. And that voice came from various life experiences, as well as from others who have corrected you for various things.

It was well-meaning to begin with, because the brain is designed to keep you safe. Self-criticism plays a pivotal part in survival because it stops you from making the same ‘life-threatening’ mistake again.

But the brain is unable to see the difference between real danger and a perceived one. So the reaction that you have to a saber-toothed tiger is the same one you would have if you got called into your boss’s office on a Monday morning.

So when you’re perceived danger is in overdrive, it starts to sabotage you. The inner critic gives relentless anxiety and constant fear of the unknown.

Most often than not we try to fight against this inner critic, but we very rarely win the fight.

Have you ever been in a situation with a very difficult person who just doesn’t understand your point of view? It tends to lead to frustration and a sense of hopelessness.

Well, this is what it’s like with the inner critic too. This inner critic has the support of a limiting belief and often when you come against it, it becomes too difficult to win the argument.

But there is a much more effective way of dealing with the inner critic that not only removes the critical voice but also empowers you.

And that is to become friends with your inner critic.

Why become friends with your inner critic?

The biggest benefit to becoming friends with your inner critic is to stop the constant anxiety that it may be putting you through.

There is only so much criticism a person can take. And the thing about this critical voice is that it stays active all day, every day.

Thoughts of not being good enough, pretty enough, clever enough, lucky enough or blessed enough are difficult for anybody to endure.

The best way to become friends with your inner critic is to start dialoguing with your mind so that you don’t need to keep fighting it. You can create a better system of communication to one of complete support.

But the only way to start this dialogue is to communicate in a different way.

How Can You Become Friends with Your Inner Critic?

If you are prone to anxiety then you may recognise a tight feeling in your stomach every time your inner critic pipes up. This is a good sign that something critical has just been communicated to you.

First, you need to find out what you were just criticised about. Did you do something obviously silly? Maybe you were in your own world driving in your car until you realised you were driving too slow.

Maybe you forgot about an important event and it completely slipped your mind.

Go back over what you were thinking about and ask yourself what the criticism was. Then dialogue with your inner critic in a none judgemental or defensive way.

It may go something like this;

Inner Critic: “You’re so stupid, you forgot to use the shortcut to go to work! Now I’m going to have to sit in traffic. How could you be so stupid?”

You: “Oh wow, I just remembered I could have gone a different way.”

Inner Critic: “You forgot so you might as well be stupid!”

You: “I would say I remembered the other route. It is important to use the word ‘remember’, because the more I use it, the more I will continue to remember important things in future.
However I quite liked using this route today. This route has some beautiful houses on it that I love looking at. Plus I have plenty of time. I love giving myself plenty of time to get anywhere I need to go and today is no different.
I am actually really glad I came this route, knowing that I have plenty of time and that it was a pleasant journey seeing all these lovely houses. I love remembering shortcuts however, so lets get more focused on remembering things rather than forgetting them.”

Inner Critic: Has nothing to say.

It’s important to take some time to figure out what kind of positive responses you can give to your inner critic. And you will know you are doing it right because your response will make you feel good about yourself.

What you will find, however, is that once you create this kind of dialogue with your inner critic, the next time you’re in a similar situation, you will respond in a kinder way.

How you speak to yourself is how you speak to others. The kinder you are to yourself, the kinder you are to others

When responding to your inner critic, believe everything you are saying back. Because the more belief you have, the more it weakens the criticism of you.

Using this method, you will automatically start to remove the false beliefs and replace them with more accurate and positive beliefs about yourself.

Before you know it, your anxiety has gone and your day feels free of worry. I suffered from anxiety for years, and I still have bouts of it. But it is only from learning to dialogue with my inner critic that I have removed my anxiety.

And any time it pops up again, I go through the same process of creating better responses and dialoguing with it in a kinder way.

Do you suffer from anxiety and find it difficult to deal with your inner critic? What kind of criticisms do you usually face. Leave a message below as I would love to hear from you.

Hi I’m Nayla

I give the best tips and techniques on eliminating anxiety and re-wiring the mind for success. I help people to achieve their dreams and desires simply by changing the way they think.

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